My son, lived in off the UVA campus. He was not a student. He was employed by the local Best Buy store there. He started at his junior year in high school. He quickly worked his way up the ladder and was promoted and we moved him to about 2 years later. He was a real go getter and continued to work hard. He was again promoted and transferred to in Aug. 2003. This town which is a college town, had high school friends who were currently in Medical school there. He moved into a nice apartment and continued to be on the "road to success". In October 2004 one of the UVA students, who had been one of his best friends since grade school moved in with Lee temporarily. On Memorial day, he and his friend Brad went to a private party at a fellow student's home. The house was very secluded with acreage and included UVA students and young people from the area. The were serving, beer, wine, rum, vodka, triple sec, etc. (I think you name it and it was supplied.) They had an ice luge and apparently, dares for who could drink the most from the luge. Both boys were drinking. Some of Lee's friends from work were also there. Lee fell asleep in the car and when they got home, his response was " Just help me to bed". The boys helped him to bed and laid him in a way that if he vomited he would not choke. There was a friend studying at the apartment when they arrived. She was studying for an RN. she even took his pulse and determined it was normal. unaware the BAC increases as the alcohol metabolized from the stomach. So Lee is put to bed, unaware by all, to die. Everyone leaves and Brad goes to bed. When Brad awoke the next day around noon the turned the tv on. He thought it was odd that Lee did not get up upon hearing him awake. He had locked Lee's door behind him the night before and knocked and he did not answer. Brad went out on the balcony and looked into Lee's room and he was as he had been left. He had not moved. He probably died within 90 minutes when left. Brad called 911 and tried CPR but knew it was too late. The rest of the story you are only too familiar with, the details different, outcomes the same.
By Lee's mother, Carol Blevins
11/03/81 - 05/29/05
ONE YEAR AGO TODAY
The uniformed men came to my home. In the early afternoon, one year ago today. The words that came from their lips caused the earth to give way, swept from under my feet. A parent’s worst nightmare.
Nothing compared to the realness of being hurled into the abyss, clouded between here and reality. Death called forth life never before known. Sounds attack the senses. Darkness and groaning prevail. Memories of the past year go unaccounted for. Previous memories have new life. More than life itself, is what was.
03/27/05, your last visit home. The last time you walked through the door. The last “Hey”, your signature greeting. The last touch of your hand on the fridge. The last time you sat in the kitchen chair. The last haircut. The last time I felt your soft brown hair. The last smell of you. The last hug of you. The last glimpse of you walking away and you in your car, the last time, going down the driveway. The last. The last of your physical presence.
The void of no return. The space which was yours to reclaim, empty, waiting. Forever to be filled with what was, not able to be filled with what is not. More than life itself, is, what was.
The constant wretchedness of intense pain and tears have subsided, replaced by a companion of regal sadness. My new friend, my constant
companion. Not a sadness that makes you gloomy all day long, but a sadness deep within the new part of me. Born of death, nursed by grief, weaned by sorrow. As we are born to
forever live, death is born to forever live. This new sadness is my friend that was born of death. How fragile still, this life still new.
Suffering helps heal, when experienced to the full. All that is left behind and lost, defy description, no words exist. All that you left behind is reserved for my deepest, most sacred place within.
"Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God; trust also in me. In my Father's house are many rooms; if it were not so, I would have told you. I am going there to prepare a place for you. And if
I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am. You know the way to the place where I am going."
Jesus the Way to the Father
The rhythm of my heart has been forever changed.
With Tender love,
ACT NOW-Before Events Leave You With No Choice
Leave your comments on the CompelledToAct Blog
Concerned about the drinking culture on campuses?
This site provides information as to the seriousness of the problem.
In Loving Memory of Kristine Guest
How and why?